The End (Beginning?)

June is over and so is my dating adventure. At least the dates and adventures that I write about. Hopefully there will be second dates. What did I think of the project? Did I learn anything?

For one thing, I learned to not take it personally that a date cancelled. There were a lot of dates that just didn't happen. Three dates cancelled (on the day of the date). Two guys said yes, had a DTR in the interim between saying yes and our date, and therefore cancelled. One guy and I could never get our schedules to coincide. Another guy said yes, then retracted when he heard I'd write about the date afterward. Plus all the unconfirmed dates, where a friend had passed along my info and said I would be contacted but never was. If those seven dates had happened, I would have met the 15 date goal for the month.

At first I was slightly concerned about not reaching the 15. I wanted to reach that number. But then I realized that the number didn't matter. Even if I had had just one date as part of the project, that's still one person I didn't know before. And I had awesome dates! All nine of them! They weren't numbers, they were people I got to know on a one-on-one basis. I enjoyed every one of my dates.

While at times the project was stressful, I never wanted any of my dates to feel like a number. I worried that they would feel this way, or they would feel less important because I had a date the next night. However, first dates are not to decide if we're going to marry each other. It's a chance to get to know each other better. In reality, we should all be dating a lot before deciding who we want to be exclusive with. Any of the guys I went out with could easily have also been going out with another girl(s). And that's great! We're not going to be compatible with everyone we go out with, and in the end we're only going to date/marry one person. Everyone else we should feel lucky to call a friend, or appreciate the time spent together. 

From the project, I learned to try to relax on a date. Lots of my dates and I talked about dating, which I would normally never do on a date! He cant' know I'm dating other people! The horrors! But it's not that big of a deal. It was refreshing to just be honest about dating while on the date.

I also learned that guys get nervous for dates, too. It was actually cute. I would worry about what I was wearing and what we'd talk about it. However, the more I stopped worrying about those things the more relaxed I was.

Every guy was so different, from their text messages to what we did on dates to their personalities. I know this isn't exactly groundbreaking news, but for me it was cool to see it up close and personal. There are amazing and cool guys out there in this world! Never pass up an opportunity to get to know someone better.

Huge, massive thanks to my friends and co-workers who were my dating ambassadors. They contacted their friends and asked if they would either go on a date with me, or if they knew of someone who would go on a date with me. They explained the project and were super supportive. When I was bummed because a date cancelled, or just felt like I didn't want to do it anymore (that halfway point was a time of major crisis) they encouraged me to keep going. Tamara provided late night pep talks as I was wondering if it was all worth it.

And it was all worth it.